Sunday, March 11, 2012

Love Never Fails...

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Heartbreak…we’ve all experienced it. That “end of the world” (I’m being melodramatic for effect of course) feeling that comes with losing the love of your life – or whom you thought was the love of your life. It was a little over a year ago that I experienced profound heartbreak. I only bring this up to segue into the point of this blog piece…which is to refrain from allowing past heartaches to jade us when it comes to love. Is that easier said than done?  Of course it is. I haven’t dated since but that’s only because I recently vowed to take some time to go on a journey of self-discovery prior to dating again. One thing I will not do is allow myself to be jaded though. If you allow yourself to be jaded…to close your heart to love…then love may very well never find you again.
There’s an old saying: “One day, someone will walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else”. Think about that for a second. In the midst of heartbreak we are unable to see past the immediacy of our hurt…we think things like “I’ll never feel this way about anyone else ever again”. I would venture to guess that there’s no one reading this blog piece that hasn’t, at one time or another, uttered those words to themselves after experiencing heartbreak.  It’s human nature…we all do it. What we don’t realize is that someday, whether it’s tomorrow, next month, next year, or 10 years from now – that person will walk into our life. That’s why it’s important to keep believing in love even when it’s hard to do so.
Some of you reading this may think that I’m being boyishly naïve…fair enough. However this is who I am and who I’ve always been. As an adolescent I remember absolutely falling in love with the story of “Romeo and Juliet” (we read it in 8th grade literature class) and I was absolutely captivated at the possibilities of a love that powerful, that meant-to-be, that magical. Now of course I knew it was fiction but I’ve always felt that life imitates art. That type of love does exist in real life; it's just that so few people are fortunate enough to experience it because they don’t allow themselves to believe in it. Quite simply, I believe that that type of love is more real than we allow ourselves to believe. There is a powerful song entitled "Entwined" by Jason Reeves. It's my favorite love song of all time. It really speaks to the amazingly powerful emotions of true, uninhibited love. Just imagine being able to experience, and to let yourself experience, something that is beyond description...something that so few people ever get to experience. How can one not believe in that?

There's something inescapably romantic about being a part of something greater than oneself...and I think that's the essence of what true love really is. It’s like taking a leap of faith...surrendering yourself to a power that is greater than anything known to us here on earth.  So if you’re someone who has recently experienced heartbreak…or even if the heartbreak has not been recent but is still affecting your belief in love, heed the words of the late writer Peter McWilliams: “It is a risk to love? Sure. After all, what if it doesn’t work out? Ah, but what if it does?”

50 comments:

  1. I don't think it is naive at all! I always say that things happen for a reason, every experience is something to learn and grow from. People walk in an out of our lives all of the time, and whilst it may seem like the world is ending, eventually the right person comes along and is there to stay.

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    1. You're right Hannah...the "world is ending" mentality is always temporary and we get caught up in this mindset that it's going to be a permanent feeling.

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  2. Some questions that arise during the reading are "Does all the heartaches worth for something after all ?! does love worth the risk to fall into tears for somebody who doesn't even deserve you ?!" ...
    Well, i strongly believe that you have given the answer in the heading "Love never fails"! We must believe in love as much as our parents used to or even more. It feels scared like hell to think of a cold & non sensitiv world...to think of ladys that only to conserve the perfect body lines give up to the main purpose that they have in life wich is to "bring a new human being to life"!
    What i am trying to say is that if your mother hadn't brought you to life, you would have never known that it has worked out for somebody, it has worked out for anybody and it will work out for you too! It just wasn't the right time, the right place, the right person... or it just had to happen like that so that you would have today another lesson learned so as to be prepared to have something better/greater later on...
    BUT let me say, whatever it happens don't stop yourself from loving! Stop yourself from making mistakes from love! Wich meanssssssss ... love in a rasonable way, give as much as you receive but never forget to love! I don't think people love only once in a lifetime, I believe that we love everytime more than the previous one...so we just remember the last one as the biggest love in our life and the greatest pain we have ever had (after we break up)andddddd that only happens because we surrender!
    There are millions of people out there and all of them are special to somebody for some reason... and there will be many other girls that you will look at as "special" because of one and only reason,,, wich is that they represent exactely what you are searching for in that moment and that she seems to fulfill all of your expectations!
    REMEMBER: "Aren't the opposites that attract but the complementary differencies" :))))

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    1. I do believe that the heartaches are worth it because of the lessons that we learn from them. And I definitely believe the risk is worth it. I completely agree with you when you say that heartaches happen as a lesson in order to prepare us for the future…we learn from each and every heartbreak. You’re also right when you say that people don’t just love once in a lifetime. I think that’s why people have that mentality of “I’ll never get over this”…because they feel that they’ll never love again – which is of course not true. Great comment from you as always :)

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  3. Great post! I don't know much about love, but hell I agree with you: it's worth it when it's right.

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    1. Thank you Claire! And yes it's most definitely worth it when it's right.

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  4. this is amazing, as i am in a bad relationship that is ending, and i have been scared to death to leave, for the fear of being alone. i love the idea of there being one true person for each of us. you have read my blog and the longing for that true love that i have. i am a hopeless romantic and i cannot wait to meet that person. This is perhaps the best thing i have read since knowing it was time for she and i to part! Keep it up, bro!

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    1. Thank you Chris. I'm sorry to hear about your relationship in the process of ending. I could kind of tell by some of your poems on your blog that might be the case but I didn't want to assume. You'll definitely meet who you're supposed to be with brother. Don't stop believing.

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  5. Keith, sorry about your break-up. You are doing the right thing to take some time off dating to heal and rediscover yourself. We all experience break-ups, but true love does exist and I'm sure you will find it. A propos of this topic, last month I wrote a poem on my blog, which may give you and others hope :) Here is the link:

    http://loredana-donovan.blogspot.com/2012/02/romantic-sunset.html

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    1. Thank you Loredana I'll definitely check that post out. Actually i've been doing very well :) the reason I wrote this is because I don't think people should sour on love just because of a bad experience. I see so many people do that and they inevitably become hardened to future love and it costs them happiness in the long run.

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    2. Glad to hear you're doing well :) Great post. I agree with you about not being jaded because of a bad love experience. I think it's normal though to feel a little sad after a break-up. And for some it may take a while to trust again. But yes it's important to keep a positive outlook and keep your heart open to love :)

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  6. I love it. I'm usually such a negative person, but I was never this way. I went through things in my early teenage years that some people have probably never been through in their life; I grew up way too fast and I closed off from everything because in my eyes everything only ever causes pain. But you're right. Recently I've just become so happy, and I feel so free. Like I did before. Now, reading this post, instead of disagreeing, I totally understand what you're saying. And I agree.

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    1. I'm really glad that you've been happier lately and I hope you continue to be happy. I'm a firm believer that if we open ourself up to possibilities the more likely that happiness will make its way into our lives.

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  7. I've certainly felt this way before, but right now I'm on the receiving end of someone who does not want to let go. I know I don't want to hold on to something that isn't right for me and I've had to eliminate all communication with this person because he will forever hold on otherwise. I have gotten the "I'll never find anyone else, I'll never love anyone again..." At first that really bothered me until I realized I wasn't responsible for his life. It's hard. Finding love is hard. I do feel there is someone out there for anyone willing to let them in.

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    1. I'd say that's not a fun situation to be in. I hope things get better in that particular situation. As to yuor other point, yes I agree that there is someone out there for everyone and that we should never shut ourselves off to that possibility.

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  8. Great post. I agree that the end of a relationship doesn't mean the end of the chance to love. I had some really bad relationships along the way. But I learned from them (painful lessons, sometimes).

    I was 40 before I got married. It took that long for me to find the right person and to be ready for marriage. When I was younger, I didn't think it would take that long, but the wait was worth it!

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    1. Yes painful lessons definitely benefit us in the long run! And the wait is always worth it :)

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  9. "Tis better to have love and lost than never to have loved at all"

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  10. It is always refreshing coming across another true romantic. I applaud your efforts of self-discovery before jumping back into dating. I think by doing so you give your next relationship the best shot possible. I really enjoy your blog, I'm glad you stumbled upon mine and gave me the opportunity to read yours.

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    1. Thank you Amber and I look forward to reading your future blog posts!

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  11. Hi I’m trying to get some viewers on my new blog and it looks like you would probably like the stuff I write. Good gob on the blog thanks: Rocket Man

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  12. I LOVED this post! I don't think you're boyishly naive at ALL, I think you're totally on the right track. I had a similar experience in 2009. I had my first heartbreak - my first 'true love' - and I didn't know how I'd recover from it. I've never felt a loss that made it hard to breathe like that. I also decided to just get to know myself a bit more afterwards. I realised it was really important, because I needed to know exactly what it was I was wanting to share with someone else. Just over a year after that goodbye, in April 2010, I met my now-fiance! I wasn't looking (I met him on a train) and I was happy and comfortable in my own skin. On that same day, (I kid you not) I even texted my best friend, 'Somewhere, right now are two fantastic guys, just waiting for the right girl to step into their lives. I wonder what they're doing right now?' (We'd had a weekend of girl power and were both single, and despite the heartbreak and some let-downs afterwards, was still hopeful as ever!) My fiance had also just separated from his ex after three years... I'm so glad he was still open to love despite being hurt a lot by that. I'm 100% you'll find something extraordinary - because you believe it's there, so you won't miss it ;)

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    1. What an extraordinarily uplifting story! See that's exactly why I feel so strongly about this sort of thing. Serendipity :)

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    2. :) Just realised about the typos in that hehe... it's late, I should so get some sleep now! It was meant to be 100% sure... and serendipity indeed - not just a pretty word :D

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  13. It's okay, I've figured it out now! Well, it seems to be okay... so now I can follow to my heart's content :) P.S. I'm going to check out 'Entwined'. What do you think of Peter Gabriel's 'Book of Love'?

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  14. There’s an old saying: “One day, someone will walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else”. Think about that for a second. In the midst of heartbreak we are unable to see past the immediacy of our hurt…we think things like “I’ll never feel this way about anyone else ever again”. I would venture to guess that there’s no one reading this blog piece that hasn’t, at one time or another, uttered those words to themselves after experiencing heartbreak. It’s human nature…we all do it. What we don’t realize is that someday, whether it’s tomorrow, next month, next year, or 10 years from now – that person will walk into our life. That’s why it’s important to keep believing in love even when it’s hard to do so. --- This was a very powerful paragraph for me!!

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  15. upon reading the title only one thing crossed my mind -- this song:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8nQy-aP_Koo

    one of my favourite artists.

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    1. Brandon Heath - I'll have to check out more of his stuff!

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  16. What else can I say? You've said it all, and you've said it so well.

    Listening to the song you mentioned...music can sometimes fill that void between the pain of now and the hope of tomorrow.

    I am addicted to a song by Patti Griffin about Martin Luther King's final speech called up to the mountain. Goosbeumps!

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    1. I will most definitely have to check that song out. You're right it is truly amazing sometimes how much power music can have...

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  17. I'm not sure if you got around to reading my thoughts on the song "Satisfied" by Jewel but it is one of those that has made me into a better person. It's all about saying your peace, because if you don't, then regret is all that you have... and no one should live with regret. Then there's the question of "what if?" It's a good question to keep in the back of your mind, but take pride in life and with the choices that have been made because everything that has happened has landed us here in this individual moment. What if things had been different? What if you never experienced that heartbreak? Would you be feeling the way you do and have the opinions that you have no if you hadn't gone through all that? I've kind of forgotten the point of my ramblings here, but I think what I had wanted to add and to end with is that everything does happen for a reason, things can and do get better in time, and don't forget to ask the "what ifs" but make sure you take it from both sides. Love... it's such a fickle thing(:

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    1. Wow you hit the nail on the head. Sometimes heartbreak can be a good thing because you learn from it, much like we learn from all lessons in life. Heartbreak helps us grow. It may be a terrible feeling but, as with all feelings, it will pass and the sun still shines the next day :) great comment!

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  18. Love love love love Jason Reeves!!! Great post! It's difficult sometimes to leave the past in the past, but it's also not fair to take out past hurts on someone who could possibly be great for you.

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    1. Very very true Casey! And yes Jason Reeves is the best! It's amazing to me that he's not noticed more. He's incredibly gifted.

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  19. Love this post. Love everything about it. So true. So honest. I'm so thrilled I came across your blog. I look forwared to more. And I look forward to loving again. Cheers.

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    1. I am so glad that you came across my blog as well! Thank you so much for the kind comments.

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    2. I love this post. I have always thought of myself as a total love, lover. I have always believed in love and even when I lost love I believed that my true love existed. It's nice when you see others that truly believe in love because it seems that more and more in this world there are more people jaded towards love, then truly believing and loving. Loved this post. Checked out the song too, nice.

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    3. Thank you Baylee! Yes more and more people have become jaded towards love so it's important for the hopeless romantics of the world to keep love alive!!

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  20. I love this post. It makes me realize that I'm not the silly one in the world for being a completely hopeless romantic. My friends can have a way of making me feel that way given that they all "don't believe in love." They'll see one of these days, though!
    Thank you for giving me the opportunity to read your blog!

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    1. Thank you Milly and yes they'll definitely see one of these days :)

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  21. The romantic in me loves that you chose that image for this post :)

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    1. Thank you! I knew as soon as I saw it that it was the perfect picture.

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  22. i think anyone who has come close to being in love can identify with this post,

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  23. Love this post.
    I am a believer...love is all you need!

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